FREEDOM

I found a quote today that seemed relevant to my process right now--

"The more fun you have, the more detached you can be from the circumstances of your life. You can cease to be obsessed by money, by how you look, by how you compare with other people, by your need for approval. You can still have fun in the midst of it all." ~ JR w/Paul Kaye

A friend and I were talking the other day about the irrelevancy of worrying about other people liking or loving you. I realized I used to do that a lot, and sometimes still fall into that pattern. When I am concerned about how I measure up to other people's standards, I find I am less comfortable with myself, less confident, less centered, less free-- and ultimately I have far less fun.

Whether other people like me, or love me, or respect me is never in my hands. It is in their hands. I am lucky in that I was blessed with a personality that most people like and enjoy-- and I try to do good with that. AND, funnily, when I care most about someone liking or loving me-- it seems to work less well. I think that is because I give up part of myself to the other person to earn their good graces. So I am less of “a person”—less of my Self-- than I am usually.

Lately, I find I care less about what other people think of me than what I THINK OF ME. I also care less about being loved than being loving. I care less about being liked and enjoyed than I care about liking and enjoying myself and my own life. And I am happier. . . and more fulfilled. An extra bonus is that I have more FUN, laughter, Lightness and joy inside of me and available to share with other people.

I am also more honest-- and I find somehow people like that a lot too. My honesty is often insightful. It is always REAL-- and people know where they stand with me all the time. My honest statements are often also funny; I think because what I say is so much a statement of "what is" that it makes people laugh. I also have more freedom when I am honest. I don't have to “try” to be someone I am not; trying takes a lot of effort. I don't have to watch what I say and/or do. I can just BE more of the time. Life is simpler and I have more energy for other things.

The interesting thing to me is that lately I have been experiencing myself as one of the wealthiest people I know. I am loved and surrounded by amazing people who adore me-- and who enjoy being with me and letting me be with and love them, just as I do that. I do not have to try at all to do anything "perfectly (as I would have felt I should in the past). I think that as I have gotten older, having survived some intense "challenges" by Life and Spirit, I have given up on being some ideal me that exists only as an image in my mind. I have moved more into alignment with the TRUEST aspects of WHO I AM—the natural state of Perfection that exists only when we are simply who we are, with no artifice. It is like PURITY of a sort, if that makes sense-- and for me that state, that way of Being, is innocent, profoundly fun and funny, and happy beyond belief. AND I can share with others just by being that for myself in my day-to-day life, whether I am by myself or with others.

So-- I found myself agreeing with the idea expressed in this quote-- that by focusing on having fun and enjoying my life, I will automatically attract those people capable of being in that place with me. Everyone else, all those who can't do that with me, will just drop away. And I will end up with even more Freedom to be who I AM.